I'm just so damn tired all the time. My CPAP device needs to go back to be calibrated as the pressure has dropped although I managed an afternoon kip the other day. Went out to the beach with Alyssa today - almost the middle of september and I got sunburnt although it was just on my arms a bit. But I think that exposure did something to both of us, she's shattered too.
By the way the goldfish thing on the right - the way it works is if you hover your mouse cursor over any part of the tank they call come over hoping you'll feed them. Just click your mouse to drop some food in. It'll keep you amused for a few seconds.
For the first time in......well, just for the first time I now know where life is taking me. OK when I was engaged in the past it was mapped out but it was done so for me. This time I've chosen this path so I have no fear or apprehension like I did in 1999. Wow, is it really 10 years ago?! Yeah it was! I'd had the car accident during the summer so I needed a mountain bike to get to work. I spent all summer on it and my leg muscles were like rocks. Then my compensation cheque came through, she took 3 quarters of it and left me with a couple of hundred pounds to get a car with - that happened at the end of august or the beginning of september. I bought this recently resprayed black XR2, it looked almost new, no chavvy add-ons. I loved that car and was always polishing it. So all that would be about 10 years ago now.
Such a change in situation. Back then she was hassling me to get engaged and married, buy a house etc and stupidly I agreed just for an easy life. But now this is all what I want. I've got no worries about this.
In case of any doubts - I have the woman I want to be with. That's why I want all this. Without her I'd still be drifting along.
